Seven signs that suggest you’re being used…
There’s no need to act on fire. We often look at the situation from “our” point of view. This makes a person biased, and makes reckless decisions. These signs will help us analyze the situation and draw the right conclusions. The following points can be used to refute or confirm stale fears.
The person only remembers your existence when they need something. He does not just call, much less to help or support in difficult moments. If he starts communicating, a request for a favor will surely follow.
If you tell a secret, or share your innermost thoughts, then someone else will know about it. Of course, it is possible to justify such behavior by chattiness and unrestraint. But, most likely, your feelings are not important, and the person does not betray the importance of important issues for you.
A friend often doesn’t answer the phone and doesn’t call back for a long time. This is another sign that you are treated indifferently, and used only for their own benefit. In most cases, a friend doesn’t care how you live or what you do.
He is indifferent to most of the events that happen in your life. You do not feel empathy or sincere interest on his part. If he is unable to benefit from it, he is not interested.
Despite the loud verbal statements, the person’s actions indicate the opposite. Do not place too much trust in beautiful words. After all, it is much easier to say than to do anything. Look at the man’s business. If he actively sympathizes with you, but is not ready to take even basic actions to help, then you are probably used.
The man twists the situation so that you have to feel guilty. Imposing guilt is a powerful way to control others. When you feel guilty, you start trying to make it up to them, and you do even more good for the “offended” without demanding anything in return.
You are trying to be controlled and forced to do things that you don’t want to do or that are harmful to your interests. It all starts with constant questioning: where you are, with whom, and what you do. And then everything becomes completely in control. It’s much easier to control the person you know everything about. If you often have to step over yourself for the sake of someone else, and he takes it for granted, then you are probably used in this relationship.
Objectively analyze these 7 points, and the situation will clear up.
How to confirm your guess
In contrast to the above attributes, these methods can confirm or refute suspicions. To clarify the situation, follow these steps.
Ask directly. Get ready morally, and have an unpleasant conversation. A friend may be surprised or outraged. But if he wasn’t selfish, his behavior will change after the conversation. He will be more attentive to your feelings, and will start asking less favors. Because he’s really interested in communication, not selfish interest.
For every person’s request for help, offer to do you a counter favor. For example, this weekend you were asked to help with a move. You certainly don’t refuse to do that, but there is one problem. The only way you can do that is if you can finish the wallpaper on Friday. Directly offer to help you with that, and watch your reaction.
Start refusing help, but show a willingness to communicate for nothing, without any benefit. If a person pursues selfish goals, then quickly lose interest, and will stop communicating.
Before you make any final conclusions, look at your behavior. Perhaps from the outside it may seem that you are using your friend, and he also has something not satisfied in this relationship.
How do you know you’re being used by a guy or girl in a close relationship…
A man in love does not think objectively. He becomes literally blind and deaf. Often he does not see, or does not want to notice, elementary things that seem obvious to others. To understand the girl or guy using you, look at their behavior and emotions:
Does the chosen one rejoice sincerely when he sees you?
Do his eyes burn?
Does the mood rise when he meets you, or do you feel irritation and apathy?
Does he willingly introduce his friends and relatives, or does he try not to advertise the relationship by inventing various excuses?
Is he sincerely interested in your life?
Trying to help in difficult moments to the best of his abilities?
Can he sacrifice his interests for yours?
Often thanks for the service rendered, or takes it for granted?
Does she strive to spend more time together, or does she remember only when she needs something?
Does not notice your shortcomings, or tries to emphasize and criticize them?
Does she make gifts or pleasant surprises for no reason?
Honestly answering these questions, you can clarify whether the girl (guy) uses you or sincerely interested, and is ready to help if necessary. Here you can learn how to overcome the crisis in a close relationship.