Greetings, my darlings! It is impossible not to be among people and not to communicate with them. Is it possible to make this communication comfortable, pleasant and useful? It is possible. But how can it be done? Today I want to tell you how to learn to understand people, human psychology, body language, how not to get lost in someone else’s subconscious and where to start.
To a monastery without a charter…
The first and foremost rule is not to impose your opinion on others. You should not try to convince others, explain their wrong, insist on your truth. Remember one simple thing – each person has their own truth. Let’s take an example.
Masha does not like rain very much, because it spoils her hair, on which she spends a lot of time. And Petya waits for rain every time, like the manna of heaven, because he is gardening.
And when Masha meets Petya and they have a conversation about the weather, they definitely quarrel because of their different attitude towards rain. Petya tries to convince Masha that the rain is beautiful, but Masha is the opposite.
All our “I want, I can, I wish” are different from those of others. If you understand that each person looks at things from his or her own special angle, then you will understand all the meaninglessness of arguments, you will understand people better, you will start to listen to them.
It is our view of things that prevents us from better understanding people around us. Each person has his own experience, a set of knowledge and situations. If you learn to throw it away, try to look at the story through the eyes of the interlocutor, then there will be much more understanding between you.
I bring to your attention the book by Eric Bern “People who play games. Games that People Play.” In it you will find examples of various stories and situations that will help you understand why people you know and others do this, and not otherwise.
Pantomime
Can one learn to understand people by their gestures? It’s easy. It takes some effort on your part, but nothing is impossible. Have you ever felt what your friend thinks without saying anything else? Or do you see what your loved one has to say?
Often our body tells others much more information than our speech. When you look at the speaker, what are the signs that you understand that he is worried, nervous? Or the unconscious feeling that the person you are talking to is lying to you. Where does it come from?
First I suggest you read the article “How to understand a person by gestures and facial expressions”. In it you will find the basic postures, learn how to distinguish between nervousness and shyness, and become better able to understand the sincere benevolence of the person.
Watch yourself and your gestures. Sometimes self-examination is a great way to understand other people. Notice in which situations you are taking closed positions. Try mirroring. The person you are talking to has a lot of sympathy for someone who is sitting in the same posture as you. Only this should be unobtrusive and discreet.
When you learn a little about gestures and facial expressions, then you will need the book by Alan and Barbara Pease “The New Language of Bodybuilding”. In it you will find a lot of examples, explanations and explanations.
Remember that it is not always possible to understand a person correctly by only one gesture. Try to look at the situation as a whole, look for additional details that will help you pick up all the puzzles of the human image.
Labyrinth
Sometimes it is difficult to understand your own thoughts, what to say about other people. Very often I hear the phrase: I do not understand my loved one; I want to communicate easily and easily, but everything rests on misunderstanding.
In order to make communication pleasant and comfortable,
try not to teach others lives,
don’t give unnecessary advice, especially when it’s not asked for,
do not insist on your rightness (read the first part of this article),
do not ask unnecessary and inappropriate questions,
don’t put a man in an uncomfortable position.
It all comes down to the fact that you need to be friendly and friendly. I will discuss this topic in more detail in the article “How to arrange people to yourself”. You should agree that it is always pleasant to communicate with a person who smiles, is friendly and friendly.
In the article “How to manage people” I talk about several techniques that help to achieve their own from any person. These techniques perfectly show how people react in a given situation. It will greatly help you to understand human psychology.
What are the skills that help you communicate with people? Do you know how to go and determine what you are lying about?
Learn to see things in people that are beautiful. Have a nice day. Have a nice day.